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'/cache/'; $file_prefix = 'wp-cache-'; // Disable the file locking system. // If you are experiencing problems with clearing or creating cache files // uncommenting this may help. $wp_cache_mutex_disabled = 1; //Added by WP-Cache Manager // Just modify it if you have conflicts with semaphores $sem_id = 1827405549; //Added by WP-Cache Manager if ( '/' != substr($cache_path, -1)) { $cache_path .= '/'; } $wp_cache_mobile = 0; $wp_cache_mobile_whitelist = 'Stand Alone/QNws'; $wp_cache_mobile_browsers = '2.0 MMP, 240x320, 400X240, AvantGo, BlackBerry, Blazer, Cellphone, Danger, DoCoMo, Elaine/3.0, EudoraWeb, Googlebot-Mobile, hiptop, IEMobile, KYOCERA/WX310K, LG/U990, MIDP-2., MMEF20, MOT-V, NetFront, Newt, Nintendo Wii, Nitro, Nokia, Opera Mini, Palm, PlayStation Portable, portalmmm, Proxinet, ProxiNet, SHARP-TQ-GX10, SHG-i900, Small, SonyEricsson, Symbian OS, SymbianOS, TS21i-10, UP.Browser, UP.Link, webOS, Windows CE, WinWAP, YahooSeeker/M1A1-R2D2, iPhone, iPod, Android, BlackBerry9530, LG-TU915 Obigo, LGE VX, webOS, Nokia5800'; //Added by WP-Cache Manager // change to relocate the supercache plugins directory $wp_cache_plugins_dir = WPCACHEHOME . 'plugins'; // set to 1 to do garbage collection during normal process shutdown instead of wp-cron $wp_cache_shutdown_gc = 0; $wp_super_cache_late_init = 0; //Added by WP-Cache Manager // uncomment the next line to enable advanced debugging features $wp_super_cache_advanced_debug = 0; $wp_super_cache_front_page_text = ''; $wp_super_cache_front_page_clear = 0; $wp_super_cache_front_page_check = 0; $wp_super_cache_front_page_notification = '0'; $wp_cache_object_cache = 0; //Added by WP-Cache Manager $wp_cache_anon_only = 0; $wp_supercache_cache_list = 0; //Added by WP-Cache Manager $wp_cache_debug_to_file = 0; $wp_super_cache_debug = 0; $wp_cache_debug_level = 5; $wp_cache_debug_ip = ''; $wp_cache_debug_log = ''; $wp_cache_debug_email = ''; $wp_cache_pages[ "search" ] = 0; $wp_cache_pages[ "feed" ] = 0; $wp_cache_pages[ "category" ] = 0; $wp_cache_pages[ "home" ] = 0; $wp_cache_pages[ "frontpage" ] = 0; $wp_cache_pages[ "tag" ] = 0; $wp_cache_pages[ "archives" ] = 0; $wp_cache_pages[ "pages" ] = 0; $wp_cache_pages[ "single" ] = 0; $wp_cache_pages[ "author" ] = 0; $wp_cache_hide_donation = 0; $wp_cache_not_logged_in = 0; //Added by WP-Cache Manager $wp_cache_clear_on_post_edit = 0; //Added by WP-Cache Manager $wp_cache_hello_world = 0; //Added by WP-Cache Manager $wp_cache_mobile_enabled = 1; //Added by WP-Cache Manager $wp_cache_cron_check = 1; //Added by WP-Cache Manager ?> My Right Work – The Big Joy Project http://www.bigjoyproject.com Ideas and inspiration for living a joy-filled life Tue, 28 Jul 2015 19:55:54 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=7.0.4 https://i0.wp.com/www.bigjoyproject.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/12/BigJoy2-547dfc06_site_icon.png?fit=32%2C32 My Right Work – The Big Joy Project http://www.bigjoyproject.com 32 32 43270858 An Interesting Twist on the Imposter Syndrome http://www.bigjoyproject.com/an-interesting-twist-on-the-imposter-syndrome/ http://www.bigjoyproject.com/an-interesting-twist-on-the-imposter-syndrome/#respond Wed, 29 Apr 2015 01:07:29 +0000 http://www.bigjoyproject.com/?p=891 Continue reading →]]> Imposter Syndrome

I’ve been doing quite an immersion in Martha Beck programs this week.

I’m listening to What Do You Want to Be When You Grow Up? Creating Your Perfect Career. The first class, The Dark Forest of Career Confusion, looks at how we tend to respond physically and emotionally when the career we’re pursuing doesn’t fit our “essential self.” The essential self is the “nature” part of ourselves…our hard wiring.

When our current work isn’t in alignment with our essential self, we can feel like imposters no matter how good we are in the work we’re doing.

We usually end up in mis-aligned work because Social Self” which is our “nurture” side … the part of ourselves which allows us to adapt to our culture and circumstances often overrides the needs of our essential self. We end up doing work that sounds impressive to other people (people whose approval we desire) but leaves us feeling emotionally impoverished.

An interesting way this mismatch shows up is when people who seem to be highly successful feel like imposters. We usually assume a person will fail in a job which requires innate talent they lack. But what about someone who has the ability yet can’t shake the feeling of being a fraud?

We’re quick to chalk this up to self worth issues but apparently, the imposter syndrome can occur when there is a mismatch between the person’s “connative preference” which is the instinctive way a person takes action and their environment.

An example of this is the child who gets labeled ADHD because she seems to be constantly talking and fidgeting in class. It turns out that some people have a strong instinct for hands-on action. They’re just not wired to sit quietly and listen or read. They need to be physically moving.

Similarly, if your connative preference differences from the dominant preference used where you work, chances are you’ll feel like a misfit. When I worked in consumer research, most of the people I worked with were “Fact Finders.” They enjoyed culling through pages of statistics and building logical recommendations. I, on the other hand, preferred the “Quick Start” approach. I would look at the same pages of statistics and see … a lot of numbers. Generally, I scanned the numbers and intuitively came up with my recommendations. My boss once wrote in my performance review that “her recommendations, while technically correct, need to be better supported by the data.” In other words, “show your work” which I found unbearable tedious.

During my first year in that job I did extremely well but I had a constant sense of dread that I would eventually be found out. And as time went on I committed several stupid mistakes which seemed to prove I wasn’t smart enough or capable enough for the job. But that wasn’t true. It was a mismatch between my way doing the work and the way I was suppose to do the work. And of course it didn’t help that I interpreted doing things differently as wrong and began to see myself as somehow “defective.”

After leaving marketing research, I became a technical writing consultant which was much better suited to my style because the work required more direct interaction with people and I found it easy to organize information I got through interviews and by working directly with the software into how-to guides and user manuals. Technical writing also made better use of my visual design skills; spatially organizing the information so it was easily accessible to my audience.

When I started my coaching business it didn’t occur to me that there would be a mismatch between my connative style and my work because I assumed as a business owner I was the one who set up my working environment. It turns out there are other factors that shape my environment that I guess I didn’t take into account. For example, the people with whom I network, my role models, my definition of the people I serve, all have a large effect on how my environment feels.

What feels good right now is knowing I have more power than I realized when it comes to deciding what I allow to shape my environment. I allowed other people to tell me what I could and could not do and what I wanted wasn’t possible if i wanted to be successful.

I’m believing that I can do work I love, make money, and do the work in a way feels right for my essential self.

 

]]> http://www.bigjoyproject.com/an-interesting-twist-on-the-imposter-syndrome/feed/ 0 891 Am I On-Track? http://www.bigjoyproject.com/am-i-on-track/ http://www.bigjoyproject.com/am-i-on-track/#respond Mon, 27 Apr 2015 19:58:51 +0000 http://www.bigjoyproject.com/?p=886 Continue reading →]]> HeartGuided

Sometimes I can chase a particular idea down a rabbit hole and get so caught up that I don’t notice I’m gotten completely off my intended path. Thank goodness I have people in my life who grab me by the belt before I completely disappear.

This was the case when I was talking with my coach last week about how I would know I was “on purpose” with my work. When it comes to work and career, I have a tendency to get easily side tracked by my social self and commit to work that “looks and sounds right” but doesn’t nourish my heart at all.

I was trying to explain why I was having trouble committing fully to a particular career path.

“I love creating information products but It’s important that people actually use the things I create and get results,” I insisted. “I feel sad and frustrated when it seems like people aren’t using my products.”

“Do you have control over whether or not people use your products?” asked my coach.

“No,” I said, confused, “But what does it matter? I want to make a difference through my work. If people aren’t doing anything with my products, how am I making a difference?”

“And,” I added, “How will I make money if people aren’t using my products and getting results? The value they get is based on getting positive results. Why would they buy my products otherwise?”

I just couldn’t see a way around this.

My coach asked me another question: “At one point when we discussed your work, you told me your greatest desire was to be a channel for your Higher Power so that your work was an expression of Divine Love. Is this still true for you?”

“Absolutely,” I said.

“If you know you’re being a channel, then does it matter whether or not people are using the stuff you create?”

This has been a touch question for me most of my life. It creates a lot of internal conflict.

On the one hand, there’s a part of me that believes that what is done with love and excellence cannot help but make a difference in the world. How can anything that is a true expression of Divine Love not?

On the other hand, I have a practical, worried side that is asking, “But don’t you need to package what you create? Don’t you need to make sure there’s actually demand for what you’re creating?”

I’ve been listening to the latter voice al my life and doing what it advises and I can’t say I’ve made very fulfilling choices work-wise. Some of my work has paid well but I felt entire parts of myself weren’t being expressed. I used to feel having to be someone I’m not was an acceptable price to pay in exchange for earning money.

No I’m asking, can I be fully myself and make enough money to live on?

So I’m slowly beginning to consider what kind of work would not only enable me to earn a living but allow me to feel 100% expressed. This brings up a lot of anxiety and I’m leaning more than ever on spiritual resources like A Course in Miracles so that I can continue choosing what my heart wants rather than giving into my fear.

This is a true, “day at a time” decision at a time journey. I am keeping the faith that if I continue choosing on behalf of my heart the path will take me where I want to be.

]]> http://www.bigjoyproject.com/am-i-on-track/feed/ 0 886